Let’s be clear from the get-go: the Grim Reaper is coming for you. No spoiler alert is required for that bit of juicy gossip! Yeah, you’ve got about 4,000 Mondays in this lifetime and chances are you’ve used up a hefty sum of them already. (I’ve used up more than half of my Mondays, so...
Take a quick peek at the Highly Scientific Vitality Spectrum, and make a note about where you happen to fall today: Feeling a bit toe-taggy as of late? Feeling like life is one giant carnival full of funnel cakes and clowns (the happy clowns, not the weird ones)? Feeling somewhere in between? Researchers have developed...
One of my biggest goals in life (right up there with convincing the candy executives to sell an all-red bag of Skittles) is to push you to the brink of an existential crisis. You’ll notice I said “brink”; I’m not an animal. Just like in the mobster movies when they dangle the guy off the...
Now that the seriousness of "The New Year" has settled (is it just me or does every new year come laden with pressure to radically change your currently crap life for the better?), we can get onto what really matters: National Fish Taco Day is just a couple of weeks away (1/25 to be exact)....
Does New Year’s Day make you feel nauseous ... and not just because you were a tad bit overserved the night before? It’s the resolution time of year, which means the go-getting goalsters out there are buffing and polishing their 2023 SMART goals while chanting their rallying cry: We must identify and pursue lofty ambitions!...
Philosophy, as they say, “was conceived as wedded to death.” Legions of A-list existential thinkers have tried to “dress the wound of mortality” by making sense of the absurdity and fragility of life: Nietzsche, Kierkegaard, Camus ... a veritable who’s who list of intellectuals have weighed in on the infinite conundrum, and annoyingly haven’t reached a...
Tired of hearing the “LIVE YOUR BEST LIFE” maxims ... yelling at you in all caps? Yeah, me too. (We spoke about it here when I seemingly-irresponsibly encouraged us to get in touch with our worst lives.) But today I’m going to contradict myself, as I’m wont to do. I’m going to get us all...
I have mixed emotions about self-control, and I know you do too. Mixed Emotion about Self-Control #1: Self-control is code for “the fun around here is definitely going to end,” and while I might not be blonde, I do like to have more fun. I bristle at the idea of fun being contained, of fun...
Any other rule-followers out there? Hi. I see you, deep into your obedient and compliant soul. This is an “it takes one to know one” situation, because I too am unwaveringly law-abiding (other than a serious desire to be recruited into an Oceans 8 sort of heist ... something we will never speak of again,...
‘Tis the season to give and receive meaningless gifts built for one purpose: trashing regifting. That chai-banana-balsam scented candle you received from Mindy at the office holiday mixer? That puppy has made the rounds. And if you plan on wrapping that monstrosity back up and putting it under the tree/ Festivus pole for your Great...
With Thanksgiving on the horizon, I’m feeling a wee bit petulant about All Things Gratitude. Is it because I’m a spoiled ingrate? No! (I mean, mostly no!) (Okay fine, I take mostly everything in my life for granted. But that’s not why I’m giving gratitude the side-eye.) I’m worried that amidst the ubiquity of said...
There is just so much we want to do in this “limited time only” life, and while most of us are aware we’ll barely reach the tip of the tip of the tip of the iceberg(s) we aim to conquer in the 4,000 Mondays we’ve got to work with, we do like to fantasize about...
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